26 Days of Silence

In honor of the innocent victims of the Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting, I will be observing 26 days of silence here at Adventures of a Muse.  

Feel Like You Are Getting Sick? Just Add Water!

Last year I became mildly interested in Chinese medicine. My chiropractor is a practicioner and I wanted to gain some more insight into some things he had told me.  What really captured my interest is how your body goes through changes with the seasons and how the foods we eat can help or hinder us depending on the season.

The food I want to discuss now is WATER!

In doing my research I learned that when the colder weather comes in fall, it begins to dry us out.  Okay, we all know this.  When fall hits here in the Northeast we all start pulling out the lip balm and body lotion.  Well, I learned that a dry body is one that is open to all sorts of germs. Hence, why we all start getting sick in the fall and through the winter.  We are too dry.  Chinese medicine suggests moisturizing foods in the colder months to combat this dryness.  I guess this is why soup is so popular in these months!

A few weeks after I read this I began to feel sick.  Just that slightly stuffy and tired feeling you get at the very beginning of a cold.  I also noticed that I was thirsty and my lips were dry.  So I started drinking water.  Tons of it. Until I was not feeling chronically thirsty.  And by then I was no longer feeling like I was coming down with anything.

A few weeks after that I missed the warning signs and actually got a cold.  Again I noticed the thirst and I drank so much water I thought I would float away and after two days I was no longer thirsty and I was no longer sick.  I took nothing else.  Just water.

This past week my more than half of the children in my daughter's first grade class I have been home with the flu.  She has seemed a little run down herself but she is on board with this water thing and is drinking like a fish and she is fighting this thing off.  And this is a kid who in past years has caught a cold at least every other week.

I have also mentioned this to a few friends and they have observed the same thing and have stayed free of the usual run of fall colds.

I guess this is why your parents and doctors have always recommended fluids when you are sick!  But how cool that you can take the fluids before you get sick and never get there!?

YOUR TURN
Stay in tune with your body this year.  When you start to feel sick or thirsty, hit the fluids.  See if you can't keep those nasty colds away this year.

Your Own Personal Christmas Carol ...Who Will You Be In 10 Years?

Every year I do an exercise.  I look and see who I will be in 10 years.

I take an hour or so with my journal and I sit quietly and I picture myself in 10 years.  I picture myself with my kids, with my husband, going to work, etc.  I observe how I look and what feelings I get and how others are relating to me.

Sometimes I just observe.  Sometimes I write in my journal.  Sometimes I just scribble down a few notes.  Sometimes it is a struggle and everything looks fuzzy.  And sometimes it is like watching a movie from the front row.

Do I like where I am headed or not?  Are these things I want to embrace ans strive towards or are there things I want to change?  I guess it is sort of my own personal Christmas Carol.

I take what I have learned and I set some goals for the year.

I have to share that I did this exercise this morning and was sort of surprised with what I saw.  You see, last year what I saw was absolutely amazing!  My visions of myself in my career really encouraged me to do some great things over this past year that I might have otherwise thought were not important.  But this year,  I didn't like where I was headed with my kids.  I can see that some of the choices I am making with them now is sending me on a path that lacks a real connection to them.  This is my opportunity to make some changes.

YOUR TURN
Schedule some time for yourself now and again each year to practice this exercise.  (Doing the exercise is actually a repeating event in my Google calendar so I don't forget!)

Find a quite place where you won't be disturbed and bring along a journal or notepad.

Close your eyes and thing about one of your current relationships or roles and ask yourself what it looks like in 10 years.  Then just go from there.  You might be able to just follow along or you might need to guide yourself to other relationships and roles.  You might just get a quick flash of something or you might see a whole scene playing out.

Record things as you wish and when you are done, take note of what you seem to have learned and act on that information as it feels right.

Good luck!

The New Moon in Sagittarius ... Try On Something New

A new moon is about new beginnings.  It is the time each month for setting intentions or goals.

This month the new moon is occurring in Sagittarius.  Sagittarius is the sign of wisdom and exploration.  We are ready to explore and we are going to go deep!  This is not about playing around the surface, it is about going somewhere meaningful.  We will have the opportunity to look at  beliefs and habits that are limiting you and try on a new way of thinking and embrace things outside your experience.

Depending on your Sun Sign (the sign you were born under), there is a particular area of your life where you are ready for this new adventure...
Aries (born 3/21 - 4/20)  The focus is on exploration ... a journey, a teacher, a vision.
Taurus (born 4/21 - 5/21) The focus is on emotional purification.
Gemini (born 5/22 - 6/21)  The focus is on your partnerships.
Cancer (born 6/22 - 7/22) The focus is on your well being... your work, your health.
Leo (born 7/23 - 8/21)  The focus is on your passion .. your true loves, your creativity, your hobbies.
Virgo (born 8/22 - 9/23)  The focus is on your roots and family.
Libra (born 9/24 - 10/23)   The focus is on communication and information.
Scorpio (born 10/24 - 11/22)   The focus is on your own resources .. your self worth, your possessions, your security.
Sagittarius (born 11/23 - 12/22)  The focus is on your self.
Capricorn (born 12/23 - 1/20) The focus is on your soul growth and spiritual endings.
Aquarius (born 1/21 - 2/19) The focus is on your sense of inner purpose .. your hopes, your wishes, your dedication to a higher cause.
Pisces (born 2/20 - 3/20)  The focus is your public image .. your career, your mark on the world.

I am a Virgo and will take some time at this new moon to give up some past behaviors for ones I want to see in the future.  There are some behaviors I have recently been seeing in myself in how I relate to my children (family) that stem from fears that I still carry with me from lessons learned as a child. (my roots).   I want to explore my future and picture how I want to be.  My intentions will center around trying on this behaviors even if they are way uncomfortable!

YOUR TURN:
After the new moon on December 13 at 3:42 AM, write out some intentions.  Look at your sun sign.  What are of your life are you focusing on?  Spend some timing thinking about where you need to go that is deeper and more meaningful than where you are today.  Your intentions should be requests to help get you to that place.

If you want to dig deeper into this new moon, here are some helpful sites ...
The Great Leap:  New Moon in Sagittarius
New Moon in Sagittarius - 2012
New Moon in Sagittarius: Come Fly With Me

Doing Christmas with Discipline and Creativity

Everyone has their holiday.  My husband is batty for Halloween.  One of my best friends and her husband lover St. Patrick's Day so much that they gave birth to their child on that day.  And I live for Christmas.

It turns out Christmas is one of those places where I can happily marry creativity and discipline to create something amazing.  Here is what I do.

I have a list.  It is a Google spreadsheet, actually.  It lists all of the tasks that I do each and every Christmas... a countdown for the kids, card, cookies, making ornaments for the kids, planning the party, making gingerbread houses together, etc.  This is the discipline.  While the activities stay the same each year, the details change as I pick a new theme for each year.  This is the creativity.

Having a list of tasks that get done every Christmas keeps me from realizing on December 23rd that I forgot a gift for Uncle John.  It keeps from realizing on December 26th that we never did our annual drive down this one street to look at the Christmas lights.  It keeps me from waking up at 2AM realizing that if we don't bake Christmas cookies the very next day, there won't be time.  The discipline of the list allows me to truly enjoy all of the great Christmas activities.

In September of each year I decide on this year's theme and pull up the spreadsheet to start designing the particulars of each activity.  This year out theme was Japan.  Our countdown to Christmas was made of origami cranes that sat on our mantel.  Gifts were wrapped with origami paper strips and paper blossoms.  Our Christmas card was a picture of the girls sitting in a cherry blossom tree.  Get the idea?  I just enjoy the creative part for a while.  I see something that inspires me and I record it in my spreadsheet.  I also have a Pinterest board to capture ideas.

After I spend a few weeks coming up with the design ideas and recording them in my spreadsheet, I pull together a schedule to complete each item.  Some things I start to do in October and some I leave for closer to Christmas.  I plug everything into my existing task list but you can certainly just put dates in the spreadsheet and work from that.  The key is to spread out the work so it is enjoyable, not overwhelming.   I also create a shopping list for supplies that I will need and when I need to buy them.

Providing myself some discipline so that I have the freedom to embrace my creative side makes Christmas a "ho, ho, ho" for me instead of a "bah humbug".

YOUR TURN:
Pick something you do each year .. a holiday, a kids birthday party, a dinner party ...and create yourself a reusable list of what tasks need to get done. Then allow yourself a period of time in advance of the date to just gather ideas and brainstorm.  Later, filter out your ideas and come up with a schedule and a shopping list.   See if you don't feel a little more joyful and excited about your event!

Nuts + Greens = Creative Dinner

Over the past few years I have tired to change my cooking style from one of following recipes to one of following my heart and my taste buds.   I still love to learn technique or try out the most fabulous of a Pinterest posted recipe but I am really trying to look at what is available to me, either ingredients or recipes,  for inspiration.

One simple way I have found to do this is making pesto.  I love pesto.  But well sometimes the good old-fashioned basil and pine nut gets a bit boring.  So, I grab a green out of the fridge ... parsley, kale, chickweed ... and I grab some nuts from the snack jar on the counter ... pecans, walnuts, cashews ... and I blend them together in the food processor with a little olive oil and salt.  Voila!  Dinner inspired by basic pesto but brought to a whole new level of creativity by paring a nut and a green.

I have done it with other dishes too.  Lasagna is just a pasta , sauce, meat and cheese.  the classic combo is lasagna noodles, tomato sauce, ground beef and mozzarella.  But how about linguine, bechamel sauce, ground lamb and goat cheese?

YOUR TURN:
Pick a simple recipe that you like to make and break down the components into things like "nuts", "greens", "beans" etc.  Then let go and use that combo to inspire you to create some new dishes.

Grabbing a Thought So You Can Let It Go

Paying attention to what you are doing in this present moment is important if you want to live a happy, fulfilled life.  Paying attention to the present moment means letting go of all of the other stuff that is going on in your head.  All of the stuff that happened last night or that is going to happen tomorrow.

But if you are like me, you find some of that stuff to be important.  But it is not important to what you are doing at this very moment.  You need to let it go.

I let it go using a little notepad.  I keep it with me all of the time.   So while I am helping my daughters with their homework and the thought that I need to make next weeks grocery list pops into my mind, I scribble it on my list and let the thought go.  Now I won't forget to do it but I won't think about it again while I am doing 3rd grade math.  Then each night after my kids go to bed I sit down with my notebook and either take care of the thoughts or transfer them to my to-do list to handle later.

This not only works for the to-do thoughts in my life but for worrying thoughts as well.  Say, I was a little short with my husband on the phone earlier in the day.  Instead of dwelling on that in the middle of helping with a science experiment, I make myself a note.  Then when I have the time I think about how I acted and why and how I can do it differently next time and I call him back and say I am sorry.

Yes, sometimes the thought that pops into my head is too urgent to go on a list for later.   Then I excuse myself from what I am doing and I deal with it.  Like when a friend calls with a crisis.  That is now my present moment.  I try not to do this often but sometimes it happens.

YOUR TURN:
Go ahead and pick something you like... notepad or a  sticky note app on your phone or a voice recorder. And capture your thoughts.  Then let them go until you can give them your full attention later on.  See if this doesn't help you to be present in the moment from now on.

Which Choice is the Right Choice?

We are all faced with dozens, maybe hundreds, of choices everyday.  What to wear.  What to eat.  Whether to leave our job.  What street to take to work. Whether to say yes to that marriage proposal.  What to watch on TV.   Whether to relocate.

Know that all decisions are important.  Some decisions seem to be unimportant but end up putting you clearly on a certain path.  (One day I will tell you about my decision to pick up a university parking sticker for my mom.)  And some decisions may seem earth shattering and amount to nothing at all in the journey of your life.  So in my mind, all decisions are equal.  None is more important than another.  And we should treat them all with equal respect.

Know that all decisions can be easy.  You already know that some decisions are already easy.  The choices that are between something you love with all your heart and something you don't.  So the key to making all decisions easy is to be aware which choice is the one you love with all your heart.  Is it the tuna sandwich or the veggie wrap?  Is it Tom or Dave?  Is is college or the peace corp?

You can figure out which choice is the one you love by listening to yourself.  Sometimes you can hear yourself yelling and cheering for a certain choice loud and clear.  Other times you need to be really quite and still to hear that small voice whispering at you.  It will take some practice to hear the whispering voice but you can do it!  Some other times you need to remove your fear about one or both of the choices so you can remove all of the static blocking out your true voice.

YOUR TURN:
I challenge you, for the next week, to treat all of your upcoming decisions as important ones and I challenge you to listen to your inner voice to tell you which choice it is that you love with all your heart.

When you are in line for lunch and you can't decide between two options, don't just pick one.  Step out of line and take a deep breath and listen.  Don't try to reason the right decision, just wait to hear it.

And if you need a little help along the way try this cool trick.  Take your left hand and take your pointer finger and your thumb together to make a circle. Like the OK sign.  Now do the same with your right hand.  Flatten the circle of your right hand a bit and insert it in to the circle on your left hand.  Now say "My name is
<insert your name>."  Use your right thumb and pointer to try to pry apart your left thumb and pointer.  Make sure you are trying your hardest to keep your left hand closed and trying your hardest to let your right hand open.  Did your left hand open or stay closed?  Whichever it was, this is your "yes" position.  Test it out a few times by asking other questions that you know are a "yes".  Now you can use it to listen to yourself by employing this technique for any yes or no question.  I use this all the time when I can't decide what I want to eat!

Mindfulness Equals Glitter in the Kitchen

I have been practicing mindfulness for 4 years now.  If you are not familiar with the concept, it basically means paying attention to what is going on right now.  Not worrying about the argument you had last night or
thinking about how you are dreading cleaning the bathroom later today.  It is about observing and experiencing what is happening at this very moment.

Wildmind has a great, in depth discussion on what mindfulness is.

For 4 years now I have been trying to incorporate mindfulness into my life.  I meditate.  I have little reminders to stop and pay attention throughout the day.  I practice.  But I am not sure I have ever experienced real mindfulness until Sunday afternoon.

My daughter was at the kitchen table working on her science project.  There was glitter involved.  And lots of cutting of little bits of paper.  And glue.  And Sharpies.  The kitchen was a mess.  In this circumstance I usually put a fake smile on my face while I scurry around picking bits of stuff off the floor and issuing warnings about spilling.  (I believe I usually tell HER to be mindful of what she is doing!  Meaning that she should be aware of the stuff she is dropping all over the floor but I had the concept of mindfulness completely wrong.  It is not about controlling yourself, it is about letting go.)

But something was different last night.  I was actually in the moment.  For a brief second I told myself to let go of worrying about the mess.  That I was going to cleanup when we were done and there was no point thinking about that now.  It wasn't going to matter how big the mess was, there was going to be cleanup and I would just do it when it was time.

So, I didn't worry about the cleanup that was to come.  Not one bit. I let go of any thoughts about it.   I talked to her about what she was doing.  I ran upstairs a number of times to get other things she needed.  I allowed myself to enjoy exactly what was going on at that moment in time.  And it was really amazing to do something without the distraction of your thoughts being focused on something else.

YOUR TURN!
See if you can't let go of an annoying thought about the future this week.  When you are in the middle of doing something and your mind wanders elsewhere.  Bring it back.  Let go of the thoughts of that past issue or future concern and bring your attention back to what you are doing right now.

If you are finding it too hard to be in the present moment, take a break.  If you just can't let a thought go, then go with that thought.   Stop what you are doing and sit quietly with your concerning thoughts and focus on them.  Just no multi-tasking with your mind!!!!!  Instead, enjoy actively participating in your present life!

When Books Ask You to Read Them

Have you ever read a book that you considered to be life-changing?  Do you remember how you came upon it?  Think back.

Over the past few years I have picked up books that have contained little gems that have propelled me from where I am to miles ahead on my journey.  Little gems that I have written down and I have incorporated into my life.  And not one of these books came to me by accident.

It first happened with The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho.  I bought this book when it was at the top of the NY Times Bestseller list.  And it sat with a pile of others from that list that I bought en mass for myself.  It sat there for years.  And then one day, after I had started on my journey, I was looking for a book to read and I sat down on the floor in front of my cabinet of unread books and looked at the covers of all of them and picked that one.  For no particular reason.  It didn't look more appealing.  The blurb on the back didn't entice me.  I just knew that was the one.  And it was.  Because where I was on my journey was accelerated by what I read in that book.  It was the right book at the right time.  If I had read it years before when I bought it, the lesson would have been lost.  I was amazed how the book found me just as I needed it.

And it happens now all the time.

I go to the bookstore looking for a book on a particular topic and I just each one on the shelf that speaks to me until I feel which one is right.  I don't spend a lot of time browsing through the book or reading the reviews.  I just hold a few and leave with the one that feels right.  And there is always something in there that I needed to read.

Or I put books on my BookMooch wishlist and they sit there unfulfilled for years until one day the book arrives in the mail.  And I know before I open it that I am going to learn something important.

YOUR TURN:
The next time someone mentions a book to you and the name sticks in your mind or the next time you are drawn to a book in the library even though it is not what you were looking for or the next time you find a book in the house that you have never read or read a long time ago, stop and take the time to read it.  Then. Because I bet there will be a message in there for you.