I Am a Reformed Inadequate Child

I am a reformed inadequate child. 

A child who pushed her passions aside because they were not what she "should" do.  A child her pursued talents that she did not enjoy because she "should" not waste them.  A child who was told what success "should" look like.

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I was the child who followed a life that well-meaning parents and teachers thought best for me.  

And that conflicted with what set my soul on fire.

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And that conflict shouted loudly to me each day "It is not okay to be yourself."

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After years of exploration far out into the Universe and deep down inside myself, I have found what sets my soul on fire and I have transformed my life from mediocre to exceptional. 

A life where I get to be my authentic self every day.

The Joy of Having a Mentor

Everyone needs a mentor. Why, you ask?

Because a mentor has a passion for YOU.  They want to help you be exceptional at whatever it is you want to do.  

Of course there are plenty of people in your life who want you to be exceptional.  

But a mentor wants you to be exceptional purely because it brings them joy.  Their investment in you is entirely selfless and is not clouded by what the relationship can bring them.  They are not looking for you to be positive reflection on them.  They have no need to judge your thoughts and ideas and choices.  They expect nothing in return but the warm, fuzzy feeling they get from having made a positive impact on the life of another.

So how can a mentor help you to be exceptional?  

A mentor can provide you with ...

information and knowledge

constructive criticism

probing questions

encouragement

tough love

a sounding board

objective advice

connections

lessons learned

inspiration

If the idea of a mentor sounds intriguing, you just have to look around to find one.  Take a look at the inspiring people you are already working or interacting with!  Look for someone who has something to teach you in the area that you want to excel.

Once you have identified a mentor, don't be afraid to ask them!  Tell them what you want and how you envision the relationship will work.   

After you have begun your mentoring relationship, be sure to treat your mentor with gratitude and respect.  Be prompt.  Be prepared with your questions.  Follow through on any suggestions your mentor has.   Keep your mentor updated on your progress.  Make sure your mentor feels that you are using their time and wisdom wisely.

And, last but not least, pay your mentor back by becoming a mentor yourself!

  

  

Plot Twist!... Those Challenging Moments That Make Life Memorable

“Attitude is the difference between
an ordeal and an adventure."
- Bob Bitchin

For years, I have been living a life trying to be "in the moment". Accepting what is and finding joy in what is happening right now. And it has been great! Until it hasn't been. Until something happens that I just can't find joy in. Something that makes me think, "oh fuck".

I bet you have been there too. Didn't get the job that you wanted? Health issue? Problems with your kids or parents? Relationship breakup? We have all had one. Or many. No matter how swimmingly our lives have been going. And you think, "oh fuck".

Well, I learned a fabulous technique to deal with those "oh fuck" moments. I don't remember where I learned it, but I have never forgotten it and I love it. Here it is. After you think, "oh fuck", you yell, "PLOT TWIST!". (Which, before it does anything else, makes me laugh a little!)

Plot Twist. Like in a book or a movie when everything is going great but then it's not. Because there has been a plot twist. And you know what? A plot twist is good. Can you imagine how boring a book or movie would be if everything worked out just perfectly? And if you really think about it, can you imagine how boring life would be if everything worked out just perfectly? If you knew exactly what was going to happen all the time? If you were never challenged intellectually or emotionally? Plot twists are what make our lives memorable!

Every once in a while we need a plot twist. It forces us to make a change that puts us back on our best path. If we are open to these challenges they will help us to grow and create a better self.

Like in the book or movie. The plot twist makes our main character stop and take notice of what is not working in their story. And with that knowledge they can make some vital changes that actually propel them to that happy ending. And when you are done with the book you look back at that plot twist and think, "thank goodness that happened!".

And that can be so in our own lives. If we can look at these "oh fuck" moments and reframe them as "plot twists", we can use them to move us forward in our story. And then look back when we finish this storyline and realize how grateful we are for where we are now. Thanks to the plot twist.

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