I have been delving into the depths of my soul for many years now and one of the primary concepts that I have learned about is being present in the moment.
For many years I got myself to stop focusing on one thing while I was doing something else. I stopped letting my mind wander. I meditated. It all felt really great. It brought much greater joy in to my life to actually be paying attention to what I was doing, to really enjoy it.
But today I went to a whole new level of understanding about being present in the moment.
A friend contacted me to let me know that my daughter was behaving in a not so nice way towards her son at school. Immediately my mind ran to the past. I am such a bad mother because I thought I had taught her about the ills of teasing but clearly I missed the mark. Then I swooped out to the future. What if she doesn't stop and then becomes a "mean girl" and all of the parents hate me and none of the kids like her?
After 10 seconds of watching myself dive back and forth between what has been and what could happen, I stopped. And I realized I needed to get into the present moment.
The present moment is talking to her about the problem. And that is it.
It does not matter what I did in the past. I can't change the messages I conveyed to her. I can't change how well she listened to me. It does not matter how we got to this point.
There is no point thinking about it.
What matters is where we are now.
It does not matter what will happen in the future. I cannot control if she will hear me. I cannot control if she will immediately be able to change her behavior. I cannot control what other people will think.
There is no point wondering what the outcome of the situation will be.
What matters is dealing with what is happening now.
So I will talk to her. Plain and simple. And in the future, if the issue arises again, I will deal with it in that present moment.
This simple realization freed me from a night of worry and beating myself up. Amazing!
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