Yesterday I attended a memorial service for my grandfather who passed away last spring at the age of 93. During the memorial service my father asked everyone to sit in a circle and share a favorite memory of my grandfather. I learned from his relatives and neighbors and co-workers that what was left in their minds was not what he did or how much money he made or what he looked like but how he touched each and every life he came in contact with by generating happiness. He saved many lives as a volunteer fire fighter, he protected the job security and benefits of the people who worked for him, he painted houses and built cabinets. He was always ready to lend a hand and pass on a book that he thought you would enjoy. He did everything with a huge smile and laughter and a very loud rooster crow. He was happy in the moment and he shared that joy with everyone around him... especially the ladies! (Over the years I watched him bring a smile to the face of many a cranky waitress.) My grandfather did all of these things because they made him feel good, not because anyone was going to pat him on the back or even say thank you.
How he lived his life ties very much in to thoughts I have been having recently about my own life and my own legacy. I want my existence to be about what I have given instead of what I have collected. I want to give positive energy and happiness and inspiration. I want to help my kids learn to do the same. I want my job to be driven by connecting with people and creating not accumulating wealth. I want my kids education to focus on learning how to learn and being inspired to be creative instead of preparing to get good standardized test scores. I want our lives to be about doing things because they make us happy, not because we are going to get a big gold star.
When I leave this life I want my relatives and friends and co-workers to sit around and share the stories of how I touched them. I want them to feel like I made a real connection with them and that I brought them happiness. I want my kids and I to learn to give to others, not for the thank you that I might get but for the joy it brings us.
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